Saturday, May 28, 2011

Time... is not on my side!!

I have been so insanely busy lately.  Time has definitely not been on my side!!  Have you ever noticed that when you have nothing to do time just creeps by, but when your life is a whirlwind mess it just flies by and you never have enough time to get everything done & even what you have managed to get done does not seem like an accomplishment because you still have so much more left to do??  I'm so like this...  have been for months!!  I haven't had time for much of anything!!  All I do is work, eat, shit, and sleep!!  I'm so over this routine!!  I need some diversity in my life!!  I am not one to live a stagnant life, and this is really starting to get to me!!  Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my job, but it is time for a vacation.  I need to be able to just up and go...  throw caution to the wind, and take off somewhere!!  I hear the train going at night in the distance...  the sound of the wheels roaring across the track, and the whistle's long sweet sound is driving me mad because I am not as free as I once was, free to go as I please...  Free to pass through the night like that whistling train.  But, If you think about it...  The train is not really free, it is only able to go where the tracks take it...  I suppose that is the way I have ended up lately, bound by my endless schedule of work and sleep!!  I am nothing more than a sleepy train passing through this life...  It's time to break free from that!!  I need to jump the tracks and go on an adventure!!!  I think I am going to take off the week of my birthday!!  I am at work and I went ahead and put in the request as I have been typing this...  I asked for July 18th thru July 24th off, My b'day is July 22nd.  This is the 1st time I have been able to write in months as well!!  It's a nice comfortable Saturday at work...  The 1st in a long time!!  I wouldn't say it is slow by no means, I have been writing this off and on since 8:30 this morning, but it's not a bad day...  I have still found time for my self, to write, which is nice!!  Maybe an update??  What's new in my insane life??

Well, Aside from the working, eating, and sleeping that have led to a feeling of being stagnant I have a lot of exciting things going right now!!  I recently purchased a car...  My poor little saturn went crappola on me!!  I went almost 2 months without a way to go and I finally had the down payment for another car.  I got a Mitsubishi Spyder Convertible.  It is BRIGHT red, with a black convertible top.  Believe it or not, I can SMUSH all four kids into the back seat, haha!!  But, now my worst half's truck and car both are broke down, so whatever...  If we didn't have bad luck we wouldnt have any at all!!  He and I haven't been fighting as much lately.  He is actually showing a lil more appreciation for me and the things that I do for him..  Although, I haven't really been home so who knows...  when I am home, I sleep, lol!!  So, We are also in the middle of buying a new Home!!  It is something we can add on to, It will be nice when we are finished!!  Bad thing is:  The guy we are buying it from never cleaned so it was NASTY!!  We have gotten most of it clean though!!  We still have to paint it, the walls are horrindus!!  We also have to get it moved!!  It is soooo stressful!!  And aggrivating!!  And the whole situation makes me wanna cry!!  But, U know what??  It also makes me sooo very happy to know that we are going to be in our own place again!!  It has been soooo long!!  We haven't had our own place since 2007!!  I mean, we own land, but the house is in ruins because it is about 200 years old and only 500 square feet...  it didnt even have plumbing until 2000 when we moved in!!  So, since 2007...  well, really and truely 2005 we have been staying with friends and family or renting a place here and there!!  I'm so happy to have something of my own once again!!  I'll post pics once we get it moved and everything painted etc...  Hell, i might give you some before and after pics...  I should have took some before I we started cleaning it!! 

So I am thinking, Just Maybe, New Car, New house, New way of life!!  It would be so nice to actually have things go my way for a change!!  I know that there is always light after dark, but you know, It would be nice not to be on the dark side of things all the time..  always in dispare!!  Although, I am nocturnal, LMAO!!!  So, yea...  I'm gonna clear the energy out of this place once it is moved and cleaned and painted!!  They lived a bad attitude, drunk, fighting all the time life...  I don't want that energy to mix with ours and cause and explosion!!  We have enough problems as it is without the influences of the residual energy of others!!  So, I have white sage and my smudging shell...  purified water, etc...  I'm going to write a spell, goddess only knows how long this is going to take me, and I'm going to bless and purify our new home...  new home, new energy!!  I am very excited though!!  The kids are just as excited as we are!!  I'll update when I can!!